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| Thief number 2 |
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| Thief number 1 |
Friday, April 29, 2011
Husband snatchers = Victoria + Kate
Thursday, April 28, 2011
I won't cook for you lol
***This babe craze small but she is making some sense in my opinion. feeling the braids and ibo accent too.....ibo kwenu
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
For when GEJ visits my blog
Dear GEJ,
First of all I love the way your acronym GEJ sounds in my ibo accent. Anyway to the main reason for this letter. Now that you have won again, I decided to let you know what I want from you. You have probably heard this many times but as I am a VVIP (lol) I am sure you will listen to me so I have decided to write this letter for whenever you decide to stumble across my palatial blog (you know they call you the facebook/internet president....you might as well visit blogsville). The book of Lamentations wasn't written for Nigerians so these are the things I need you to do ASAP:
1. Electricity. Please Please and Please, the NEPA or PHNC or wareva they call it now needs to start doing its job. The high cost of doing business in 9ja and the gum-body heat (which sometimes comes with mosquitoes at night) is more than enough reason to get electricity working ASAP!
2. Safety, safety, safety. Security, security, security. The cost of maiguard/aboki is probably going up due to lack of trust in our police force. Worst still, the aboki or security that stand in places like Mr. Biggs (at least the one near my house) really can't do more than open and close door. If police is really our friend, then they need to beef up security measures so that I can feel safe in my country. (This may mean you have to pay the police officers more salary o)
3. Murtala Mohammed International Airport (MMIA). This should have probably been like number 1 because e dey pain me for bele, especially the BA checking area. (And no disrespect to other airports but u just can't step to MMIA in terms of importance) They either need to expand the airport or come up with some form of abracadabra that stops making travelling a nightmare. From the waiting lines to the staff to the AC and ventilation system due to odors of sweating bodies that just left the sun. I have too many horror stories arriving and departing but ill stop here
4. Pension. Now this one doesn't really seem like it affects me for now but for the mamas and papas who have served their country diligently (or even if its half-heartedly sef) I decide to advocate. Stop making them stand in line in hot sun then telling them to come next month until they die of hunger, starvation and heat (again electricity please)
5. NYSC. This is another heart felt number. So lets call it my personal beef. NYSC seems to me like a complete waste of time (especially the 3 weeks camp....ok maybe im just lazy) so if you could please find a way to better engage youths for a year, or better still make it optional or scrap it all together, you would have made my year. There is no need worsening the quality of education by sending graduates that couldn't care less about teaching to teach our future leaders of tomorrow in subjects that they themselves may not even be strong in. How many of you still remember your secondary school algebra?
6. Education. Like pension, this doesn't seem like a problem that directly affects me but it may affect my unborn children. The quality of education needs to be flying on a fast track if we want to produce globally competitive graduates. They say education is the great equalizer. In a country with a huge class disparity, getting education together will be welcomed by the majority that voted you in (which by the way UN or World Bank says is living under $1 a day)
7. Healthcare. We can't all be doing community donations to fly to India, Germany or US or even Reddington at our backyard there at Ikoyi, because we want decent treatment or worse still, because we want to save our lives. I am very afraid to fall seriously ill in the country and I assume many people are. However, shouts out to Egbon Fashola cause someone told me he sponsored their medical bills o (na so I hear the tory o). Anyway, get the healthcare together first then we will then talk of health insurance or national healthcare but for now, work on the treatment. You are a doctor by profession right?
8. Economy and everything employment sef. We can't keep on churning out more graduates than our public and private sector can bear. This has lead to the increase of yahoo yahoo and jazz and old papis and mamis smuggling drugs. In addition, the electricity issue (you see how serious I am about that one) and other anti-business conditions like "omo oniles" aka "area boys" and lack of relevant, necessary and easily accessible information and perpetually unfavorable credit/loan terms, makes doing business a problem in Nigeria. People are going to our blacker brothers and sisters in Ghana to do business. We can't sit and watch our house burn while our neighbour is building a mansion.
9. Transportation. Again I don't care much for 9ja public transport system with all this talk of "one chance" people and plus its just not comfy abeg (im sha a professional bus rider here sha lol). Anyway, I hear you are doing train and all. That is good but the problem is much bigger than that. From the quality of transportation, to the roads to traffic to road safety....we both know the list goes on. Egbon Fash in lagos has tried on this front so you may want to talk to some of your other governors about this.
10. Patience Dame GEJ. The thing I like most about your return as president is the fact that we get to see your delectable wife. Please promise that she will continue to be in the public eye in your 4 years and the comic relief she provides everytime we see her makes basketmouth and julius agwu look like novices
Thanks for your time as I know you are a very busy man and my warmest regards to Dame,
Signed:
Olori "fine girl no pimples, just dimples"
*****I assume he reads comments too lol so if you have more to add to the list please add o. He may just use style make one of us ministers now lol
First of all I love the way your acronym GEJ sounds in my ibo accent. Anyway to the main reason for this letter. Now that you have won again, I decided to let you know what I want from you. You have probably heard this many times but as I am a VVIP (lol) I am sure you will listen to me so I have decided to write this letter for whenever you decide to stumble across my palatial blog (you know they call you the facebook/internet president....you might as well visit blogsville). The book of Lamentations wasn't written for Nigerians so these are the things I need you to do ASAP:
1. Electricity. Please Please and Please, the NEPA or PHNC or wareva they call it now needs to start doing its job. The high cost of doing business in 9ja and the gum-body heat (which sometimes comes with mosquitoes at night) is more than enough reason to get electricity working ASAP!
2. Safety, safety, safety. Security, security, security. The cost of maiguard/aboki is probably going up due to lack of trust in our police force. Worst still, the aboki or security that stand in places like Mr. Biggs (at least the one near my house) really can't do more than open and close door. If police is really our friend, then they need to beef up security measures so that I can feel safe in my country. (This may mean you have to pay the police officers more salary o)
3. Murtala Mohammed International Airport (MMIA). This should have probably been like number 1 because e dey pain me for bele, especially the BA checking area. (And no disrespect to other airports but u just can't step to MMIA in terms of importance) They either need to expand the airport or come up with some form of abracadabra that stops making travelling a nightmare. From the waiting lines to the staff to the AC and ventilation system due to odors of sweating bodies that just left the sun. I have too many horror stories arriving and departing but ill stop here
4. Pension. Now this one doesn't really seem like it affects me for now but for the mamas and papas who have served their country diligently (or even if its half-heartedly sef) I decide to advocate. Stop making them stand in line in hot sun then telling them to come next month until they die of hunger, starvation and heat (again electricity please)
5. NYSC. This is another heart felt number. So lets call it my personal beef. NYSC seems to me like a complete waste of time (especially the 3 weeks camp....ok maybe im just lazy) so if you could please find a way to better engage youths for a year, or better still make it optional or scrap it all together, you would have made my year. There is no need worsening the quality of education by sending graduates that couldn't care less about teaching to teach our future leaders of tomorrow in subjects that they themselves may not even be strong in. How many of you still remember your secondary school algebra?
6. Education. Like pension, this doesn't seem like a problem that directly affects me but it may affect my unborn children. The quality of education needs to be flying on a fast track if we want to produce globally competitive graduates. They say education is the great equalizer. In a country with a huge class disparity, getting education together will be welcomed by the majority that voted you in (which by the way UN or World Bank says is living under $1 a day)
7. Healthcare. We can't all be doing community donations to fly to India, Germany or US or even Reddington at our backyard there at Ikoyi, because we want decent treatment or worse still, because we want to save our lives. I am very afraid to fall seriously ill in the country and I assume many people are. However, shouts out to Egbon Fashola cause someone told me he sponsored their medical bills o (na so I hear the tory o). Anyway, get the healthcare together first then we will then talk of health insurance or national healthcare but for now, work on the treatment. You are a doctor by profession right?
8. Economy and everything employment sef. We can't keep on churning out more graduates than our public and private sector can bear. This has lead to the increase of yahoo yahoo and jazz and old papis and mamis smuggling drugs. In addition, the electricity issue (you see how serious I am about that one) and other anti-business conditions like "omo oniles" aka "area boys" and lack of relevant, necessary and easily accessible information and perpetually unfavorable credit/loan terms, makes doing business a problem in Nigeria. People are going to our blacker brothers and sisters in Ghana to do business. We can't sit and watch our house burn while our neighbour is building a mansion.
9. Transportation. Again I don't care much for 9ja public transport system with all this talk of "one chance" people and plus its just not comfy abeg (im sha a professional bus rider here sha lol). Anyway, I hear you are doing train and all. That is good but the problem is much bigger than that. From the quality of transportation, to the roads to traffic to road safety....we both know the list goes on. Egbon Fash in lagos has tried on this front so you may want to talk to some of your other governors about this.
10. Patience Dame GEJ. The thing I like most about your return as president is the fact that we get to see your delectable wife. Please promise that she will continue to be in the public eye in your 4 years and the comic relief she provides everytime we see her makes basketmouth and julius agwu look like novices
Thanks for your time as I know you are a very busy man and my warmest regards to Dame,
Signed:
Olori "fine girl no pimples, just dimples"
*****I assume he reads comments too lol so if you have more to add to the list please add o. He may just use style make one of us ministers now lol
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Akanchawa
****She and her husband are like the Jay Z and Beyonce of ibo gospel music (or sha they are top dons sha). I am feeling particularly blessed this week so decided to spread the blessings around. Long but if you listen to it as background music (especially if you don't understand ibo), it will serve its purpose :)
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Did Ribadu step down for Buhari or na rumour?
Alo peoples. I have been hearing somethings about CPC and ACN trying to join hand so they can win GEJ in the presidential elections. Infact some people said they have already joined hands sef and Ribadu has stepped down. Ermm that doesn't seem like a very wise move by either party to me if it is indeed true o. Ahn ahn doesn't Ribadu have more popularity votes than Buhari who is still trying to shake himself of his military days skan skan so why not Buhari step down? Plus from the results we have been hearing from last weeks elections, ACN seems to be doing better than CPC so ki lo de? Those that have more info biko supply gist abeg cos this may just move people to go and pless umblerra which is what they are against.
*****by the way this CPC logo isn't werking fa me. Ahn Ahn didn't they see umbrella and broom. What is this pen and flag business?
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Another earthquake hits Japan
According to Yahoo!:
TOKYO – Japan's northeastern coast has been rattled by a strong aftershock. The Japan meteorological agency has issued a tsunami warning for a wave of up to one meter. The warning was issued for a coastal area already ravaged by last month's tsunami.
Officials say the quake was a 7.4-magnitude and hit 25 miles (40 kilometers) under the water and off the coast of Miyagi prefecture. The quake that preceded last month's tsunami was a 9.0-magnitude.
Buildings as far away as Tokyo shook for about a minute.
***My prayers to the people of Japan but really ki lo de. They haven't finished recovering from the first one, the nuclear reactors and now this. Plus there is talk of a Tsunami warning as well. God help us all o. At times like this I am very thankful for my now abeg. Its not perfect but nothing close to what those of Japan have been going through.
Saturday, April 2, 2011
A woman with baggage is worse than a man with baggage?
Alo everyone!!!!!! So I came across this love column on the Punch website. The guy was seeking advice on him marrying an older widow. What gingered me most was the comments that followed. It was a mixture of funny and just wrong (emphasizing how our culture belittles women). I want to know what you guys think of the whole thing but more importantly, do you think the advice will be different if the lady was older but the guy was the one who lost his spouse and had 2 kids.
Question:
"There is this lady I want to marry. She is 2 years older than me: she is 36, while I am 34. She lost her husband some years back and she has two children. I love her dearly but I don’t know what to do."
Adviser's answer:
"No big deal, you can go ahead to propose to her but you need to know how to convince your parents/relatives on why you are marrying a widow with two children when you are not a father yet. Maybe, you both should keep the age stuff to yourselves and think of how to make them accept. If you are comfortable with her past and her kids, go ahead, at least her former marital experience should be able to guide her in your home."
Some comments:
Question:
"There is this lady I want to marry. She is 2 years older than me: she is 36, while I am 34. She lost her husband some years back and she has two children. I love her dearly but I don’t know what to do."
Adviser's answer:
"No big deal, you can go ahead to propose to her but you need to know how to convince your parents/relatives on why you are marrying a widow with two children when you are not a father yet. Maybe, you both should keep the age stuff to yourselves and think of how to make them accept. If you are comfortable with her past and her kids, go ahead, at least her former marital experience should be able to guide her in your home."
Some comments:
- Hope the so called love is not because the lady has property? But if it is genuine love you can move forward.
- Cos u are 34, you think u cannot get a younger lady to marry?, something is surely wrong with you. You do not love her, what you are feeling is infatuation, not love. Boy, wake up from ur slumber, or has she prepared vegetable for you? Do u contribute to the death of her husband? Leave her alone, and let somebody in her husband family take her over. you want to use ur first savings in your life to take care of another mans children.Think very well and stop tormenting the poor woman.
- For you to prepare yourself well you need to cover some grounds. 1st, let her know how you feel. Based on her response you will know whether to move on or not. If she’s receptive then both of you need to be real and discuss the possible hurdles ahead. You stand a good chance with a widow if she chooses to be with you same as you would with a single girl. It’s how both partners handle the situation that matters most.
- Guy forget that lady look for a new lady and marry remember that she will like to be in command after all she has gotten everything in marital life my broda wise and look for a single woman and marry
- pls fined out the circomstance tha lead to the dead of her late husband it very important,befour you go in there
- IF YOU LOVE YOUR LIFE FORGET ABOUT THIS LADY!!!!! READ IT IN CAPITAL LETTERS
- re examine your head very well before going into the marriage. I hope it is not because she is probably picking ur bills now that is why u want to marry her. Yeye lazy man, wey dey hide him laziness inside love. Go and work to earn a living for yourself and build a happy home with a girl you can manage.
- WOULD SAY ITS OKAY, IF U TRULY LUV HER. BUT REMEMBER THAT A MAN WHO MARRY A WIDOW WITH TWO KIDS, MARRY THREE THEIVES. SO DO NOT BE CARRIED AWAYS N BE SURE OF YOUR FEELINGS AND WANT U WANT FROM D MARRIAGE.
- ay, so because she is a widow at 36 she does not deserve to be loved and to remarry. if it were your sister or daugther you would give this advise. please keep your wicked and insensitive advise to yourself. when they carry the corpse of an outsider it seems like it is mere wood but the family member wail because they know a loved one is lost. think before you write please
- I bet u, u will regret ur action later. Evrytin may seems okay but u suldn’t do dis. Remember she has already had 2 kids. U will b fed up taking care of dis kids later on.
- pity you!!!. It is always sweet at this stage, but i bet you, you will regret it later on. Are there no girls in nigeria again?
- Before you go into this have it in mind that you need to love the widow and the kids,to me i dont see anything bad in that but the important thing is are you comfortable with her and her kids?mind you she need alot of care now.
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