Earthquake Okafor and Hurricane Irene plus other things

Hello peoples!!!!!!!!!!! I really need to update more regularly. That will be my new years resolution along with marrying Dangote and going to the moon :) anyway I was in Earthquake or Aftershock Okafor. Nna men dis oyibo do not like their lives. Just in film how something bad will be happening dey will be standing dere to watch film, e nu kwa? I will rather hear d story when I get out alive biko. They will be taking pictures to put on twitter or facebook or send to cnn. 

That is how it was. I was jejely at my desk doing what I was employed to do or maybe reading wall street journal and bbming. Suddenly suddenly, the floor shook. I said mba nu, o na construction. mind you im on d 5th floor so I wonder what kind of construction that will be. And for some reason I wore a sexy dress and my highest heels to work looking like a model from Elle magazine but at the time I kicked the heels off to chillax and tinz like a boss lady now. Anyway back to the story, then the second shake came. Nna see olori beating marion jones. Usain Bolt had norin on me u can best believe that. Shoe in hand (i dnt really know why i took d shoe sef) and fone in hand and I was jacking it off. my oyibo co workers were still asking wats going on. I never take the stairs so I didn't know where it was. As I was running I sawe ppl gathered near d elevator I said, kweke!!! wat r u ppl doing at elevator biko nu please show me the stairs. u could see the light bulbs going off in their heads like "oh thats true we need take the stairs". I think it was my run that put them on high jump. so we all ran towards stairs o my fone fell they said "olori ur fone" i said nna "forget that thing, to replace blackberry 9900 one bb sha o di very easy. my life is priceless. if we make it, i will find d fone later. as we were on second floor, on lady joined the race and she was now catwalking. nna men if not for the civil person in me she might have lost some teeth for that nonsense she tried.

Now the shock wasnt like Japan or anything but me i thought it was the pre-shock to a major earthquake so my thought was get out fast so that building wont fall on me. Some thought it was a bomb and for where I work, that is a very feasible assumption. Anyway, we got out fine and we heard it was aftershock. I was already reminding God that He said that He can't lie to me so this is not how I am going to die. Well my God came through for me biko. Infact my co worker said when next there is a natural disaster he will follow me because the way I was clearing people from my way, o di kwa too impressive.

Now I don't know where we have hurricane and earthquake in the same week but here we are o. We haven't been told to evacuate (DC chilling *woop woop*) and the weather looks all peaches and cream this morning so I have faith it doesn't hit us too bad. God already answered my prayers of reducing the intensity so no shaking. to those who have to evacuate, please stay safe....THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO DO ODEISHI NWA NNEM.....poison no dey kill black man, hurrican irene does.


UN Bombing
I was so pissed off by the bombing yesterday of the UN building. when did this rubbish start in 9ja biko. I haven't checked who claimed the bombing but I suspect boko haram with their al qaeda connects cos i doubt boko is that sophisticated. Dis is wat we get when we deal with these ppl with kids gloves. well this got international attention so I guess this will put pressure on GEJ to act. Military should be fully deployed to these zones. or better still let MEND handle boko haram pls. A rogue will know a rogue. my prayers to the friends and families of those who lost their lives or got injured. 

Mercy and Lovely
Lovely and Mercy J baby. Lovely, you kinda took your time to come out with your story o. their relationship was never really a secret to the public yet you waited till one month to their wedding to prove your case. to me that doesn't look like you are serious about the marriage. As for Mercy, if stuff hits the fan, you can't say you weren't warned. Happy Married or Marriage life (i forget how they say it) Mercy.

Real Housewives of New Jersey and back talking kids + basketball wives LA
So if you watch RHWNJ,  you know Ashley. The over grown baby. I don't know where you get off talking to your parents like that. School you no wan go. Work you no wan work. And she cant even realistically use the single mum or broken family excuse or rationale here because all four parents have tried their best for her. I think she should spend a week in 9ja with my aunt.  Even russian dolls (the new russian hrybrid between jersey shore and real housewives of NJ), the mum asks her a simple question and she calls her a B*tch. Well lets just say I will be whipping my kids to order. 9 Months aint no joke.

So you remember the chick in basketball wives miami whose sister supposedly slept with Shaq and made Shaunie divorce him. How she was all playing Mrs over secure home and she doesn't play all these petty games. well from the preview, she looks like she is the Evelyn of LA so I will def be watching...tune in monday at 8 or 9 or 10pm on VH1

Arsenal
In God we trust.............I hope my power doesn't go out so I can watch the Man U vs Arsenal game. I will need to pray and fast to atleast come out with a draw in that match. And all the red cards dey have been given us this season. so far, a red in ever game.......we dey watch u o awon referees association, we can like to start anoda riot o.

And Madam Patience Dame GEJ has been MIA for a while so in dedication to her.........Jonathan, Jonathan, Jonathan ka ge so, o ne me me o na ma ma, Jonathan ka ge so......I am too lazy to find the video but use your mind imagine am. See you on your blogs and have a lovely weekend!

Dey better not cancel premier league matches o!!!!

This is supposed to be short cos na vex bring me here so make i talk my thing comot. On second thots, how una dey? how body? hope everything is senge menge wir u? *in my "fune" infused ibotic voice*

Bia london people and the people of ukey. OGINI ZI? TANI GBO GBO RUBBISH NOW? u ppl didnt fight and riot since its now when the Premier League season is about to start that you people want to dey misbehave. Dem kill person don turn free looting for all. una dey help gucci and apple reduce inventory for next season supply abi. thunder fire you who send you? Una no go fight for chelsea and manchester na for north london una get power. nd why can't the police just throw bomb tear gas and end this madness biko. PLS let dem not cancel my Arsenal match dis saturday o.